spring HDs

So I am on a total roll. I definitely have strides where blogging is good for the soul. It's good for this soul of late it seems.

Well, the Spring Holy Days are fast-approaching. Five weeks before Passover. I can't believe it's almost here already. Every year, we are supposed to examine ourselves -- 2Cor 13:5 reads, "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you--unless, of course, you fail the test?" And 1Cor 11:28 says, "A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup." And there are tons of ways you can do it, many have been talked about in recent sermons from HQ and our local leaders' speeches. Among them: read through 1Corinthians and identify Spring Holy Day references. (I have never counted how many times Paul says, "leaven," but it is many!) Analyze the Sermon on the Mount and the Beattitudes and the armor of God in Ephesians 6.

I've decided to read through 4 chapters of 1Corinthians a day, take notes (like I am actually studying it...), and look for those Spring HD references. One I came upon yesterday is in chapter 3:14-15 -- If anyone's work which he has built on it endures, he will receive a reward. If anyone's work is burned, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire.

Paul is talking to Christians, and the reference seems to be making it to the Kingdom. What's scary is that, despite one's declaration of being a Christian, his work, the elbow grease he puts into his life will determine the shape he's in when he gets there. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be dealing with 3rd & 4th degree burns when Jesus Christ returns. I'd much rather be ready to hit the ground running. I mean, really, let's get to work, people!

But if I honestly take a look at the quality of my spiritual life, how well I communicate with God and He does so with me through study, my material is probably not gold, silver and precious stone. It's more like wood or hay or straw, though I'd like to think it's more like earthen clay...somewhere in the middle. I say I am in the middle, riding the fence perhaps? Oh, that's even worse! Am I truly admitting that I am Laodecian? Ay.

I don't have the composure to divulge further. I can, however, be truly ready and willing to continue to find time to dig deep and take a good look in the mirror. The promise really is perfection, and that only when Jesus Christ takes His stand upon His return. I say, bring it.

support

I don't have to reitterate the insanity of the first days of Abe's air-breathing life. We ended up with an unplanned cesarean delivery and a wretched BFing experience. However, it has all been worth it. Our planned homebirth brought us so much peace -- my midwife was so incredible. When there were things that came up that could have led to an early C-section, she found a way to wait for my body's interpretation of the right time for labor. There was a lot of processing I had to do; I felt totally defeated after fighting for nine months to avoid the threat of a cesarean. (Society's pressure to have a hospital birth is so strong. Society doesn't tell you that the national average for surgery during labor is extremely dangerous, but birth isn't "extremely" dangerous at all. If anything, it's beautiful and empowering!)

So this time around, we have chosen to have a hospital delivery. Licensed midwives in the state of Arkansas cannot deliver VBAC (though they can in most states where homebirth midwifery is legal). I could go with an unlicensed midwife, but I have anxiety there. So we're going to have a monitrice -- a midwife who doesn't do prenatals, but is your birth coach and is there for as much of the labor as you want and need her there. The joy is that she is apprenticing with my midwife from Abe's birth. They have very similar philosophies and approaches to birth. She is excited to labor with us at home until I am ready for the hospital. This means that I get to build momentum where I am most comfortable, then go to the hospital (with a team I am really happy to work with, may I mention!) when I am far along enough to make it. If my labor is so fast that I don't make it to the hospital, I have this amazing woman there to guarantee safety! What more could I ask for?

While I really had to work through the disappointment of a cesarean delivery with Abe, I get to celebrate Baby Two's entry into this world with a wonderful team of people, including my supportive husband, monitrice and a doctor who cherishes healthy, mother and family friendly birth. Three hurrahs!!!

diaper rash

For 15, almost 16, months Abraham has had ABSOLUTELY no diaper rash. I commend the cotton for it; cloth diapers really are amazing, especially at helping moms prevent painful diaper rash. Well, those bragging rights are over for us. This weekend, we took a trip to Fort Smith. Abe's bedtime is 7, and we left about 5:30, so we figured he'd be out in the car and then go straight to bed. We were right about the first half. In anticipation, I doubled his prefold (which is what I do every night...). Apparently, he pooed at sometime in the night, probably right when we left Fort Smith and before he fell asleep. So we get home, he wakes up when the garage door light comes on, totally awake and aware. So we completely avoid the night time routine and just put his PJs on. Mark reads to him and he falls asleep within about 20 minutes, longer than normal, but that's to be expected with his hour long nap on the ride home. In the AM, poor guy is ANGRY. I figured it was teeth. Afterall, he is cutting 6 at present. After about a 1/2 hour of whining, I decide to change his diaper (the normal fiasco ensues). But when we're all done, he is our happy baby. Unfortunately, the discovery of the 13 hour old poo is made in the meantime. With the poo is the rash. And it's bad. His skin is chaffed and raw. I googled, "natural remedies diaper rash." First suggestion: Bag Balm. SWEET action. I have a whole container stowed from when I first started BFing. So between Bag Balm and airy cotton, I hope my boy heals soon. It is absolutely heart-breaking to see his hiney in what has to be so much pain.

So suggestion to moms -- invest in some prefolds (for times like these, what they have at Walmart will do), a Snappy, and some Bag Balm. Let that rash air out. I still haven't found the gumption to let him run around naked. Maybe I will later today!

homemade dishwasher detergent

We spend about $10/month on dishwasher detergent. Two thoughts: I don't have to use the dishwasher everyday and homemade dishwasher detergent is SO much cheaper. Here's the recipe:

two cups washing soda
two cups borax
one tablespoon of citric acid (or lemon juice powder)

VIOLA! The beauty: that recipe will last you a month, easy and it costs about $2. The best part of being home with my little man is that I get to enjoy his sweet life, yes. Second best is these fun discoveries. It's green, it's easy and it's so much cheaper than conventional detergent!

white vinegar

I am not sure I have yet expressed the utter joy it gives me to use white vinegar. It's strong, but boys and girls, it cleans. I am using up the last of all my conventional bathroom cleaners, kitchen cleaners, bleach and whatnot, to be replaced with the one, the only WHITE VINEGAR. This stuff is amazing. Between it and washing soda, my domestic life has taken a turn for the better!

simplifying

Life has been challenging me to find balance. Is that not always the challenge? Perhaps for those who are not so insane, your balance just comes to you. That is not so with me. I have to work hard to find it, and then when I do find it, I have to check and recheck that I have indeed found it.

Since we're pregnant again, my diet has become the thing nagging at the back of my mind. When we met with our midwives frequently, they were sure to enquire about our eating habits. Since we aren't using a midwife this time (not by choice, but because we are attempting a VBAC and don't want to use an unlicensed midwife. (State regulations and rules about midwifery might be a viable option for a later post.)), I haven't been as diligent about making wise food choices. I say we don't have a midwife, but we do have the "spirit" of one. We are going to use a sweet friend named Mariah White to act as our monitrice/birthcoach/doula. She is currently apprenticing with the midwife from Abe's birth, Jennifer Creel, and will be a full-on licensed midwife in about 6 months (I think). While I find it hard to hold myself accountable (lame, I know, but I love a cherry vanilla coke from Sonic, McDonalds french fries and various other forms of junk), Mariah asks about my eating habits.

She joined me for my prenatal (19 weeks) last week and gave me a few great suggestions. The simplest was to buy a bag of frozen fruit...make it fun. Sam's has massive bags, as does WalMart, of strawberries, peaches, pineapple and mango. She also suggested, making and eating my own granola. After Abe was born, I LOVED making my own granola. But have since gotten lazy. It tastes so much better than anything store bought, and I can put blackstrap molasses in it to help boost my iron. This week we are implementing those two things. Once things become habits, I find it so much easier to be the person I intend to be, to find that ever-sought-after balance I need.

etsy!

first of many

Tomorrow is Abe's first birthday. We are not really into big birthday shin digs, just like to keep it 'familiar' (Spanish for family). Really, though, just close knit. As his Mommy and he as my first, I am really really excited. I am baking blueberry muffins from scratch and then we'll do funfetti cupcakes for after lunch and when Daddy gets home. We might have some friends over for lunch and playtime. The cool thing about keeping it low key is that it gets to be super special. I've always imagined being one of those moms who has hot cookies waiting for their niños when they come in on a cool Fall day from school. This day is just a celebration of a foretaste of many more beautiful days to come.

I have been meaning to write about our cloth diapering experience. Recently, one of my college friends, i.e. "Salem Sister", started a Facebook group. But this here blog is much more global, so I thought it very appropriate to throw out my thoughts thus far on cloth diapering. Enjoy!

Whenever someone asks about cloth diapering, I always start off by telling them it's my "favorite green thing" that we do. We compost and recycle, but it's amazing to know that for every poopy diaper I clean, there is one that is not damaging our earth and water.

I am just going to copy the text of a couple of emails.

//All-in-ones are pretty self explanatory -- you have a cloth diaper that functions like a disposible. Some have inserts that help soak up wet. Use them, toss them (in the hamper or pail), wash them. Ta-da. I don't prefer them for two reasons. One: they are expensive, and two: they're usually big and bulky (don't fit in cute little baby clothes! That's my vanity ;))

Prefolds -- there are a million ways to do prefolds. A prefold is what you think of when you think of a cloth diaper -- a long, rectangular piece of cotton with 3 sections, the middle one being the most absorbent. I've heard of a number of different types of prefolds -- bleached cotton, unbleached cotton, hemp, wool & chinese cotton. Obviously, the bleached v/s the unbleached is white versus organic, not white. Hemp & chinese cotton are supposedly more absorbent. I've never tried them, so I don't know. My experience is that the unbleached cotton is more absorbent than the bleached.

The only hemp & wool I've seen are not technically "prefolds," but that's how they function, same premise. I think the ones I've seen are called panels (?). I guess they can be simpler to use (because you don't have to fold them...). The reason we don't use them is that they are more expensive. I might actually try a wool panel (tucked into the prefold) for night. Wool is supposed to be really absorbent and it 's naturally antimicrobial. (More on night diapering later :))

I got a great deal on 75 bleached prefolds from a cloth diapering service that went out of business. I'd definitley suggest getting in touch with a local service for this very reason. I am SURE Raleigh has one... Just ask if you can buy some used prefolds. Sustainability, baby!

We use a prefold and a wrap. A wrap holds the prefold on and *usually* keeps the wet from the clothes (this is called wicking, when it does leak). There are TONS of wrap brands. My favorite are Motherease, a local (to Fayetteville, AR, where we live) lady's brand, and Swaddlebee's Blueberry. (Swaddlebee's most well-known is what's called an ABC wrap, and I like them, but they wick REALLY easily...their Blueberry is much like the local wraps, but comes in a one size fits all and they fit Abe really well.)

I do not recommend ANY velcro. It gets all linty and it wears out really quickly. I do recommend snaps :)

Basically, you fold the prefold and place it in the wrap and them snap it up. Google "folding cloth diapers" to see some visuals. There is a way to do it if you have a girl or a boy. ...Really, though, there is not wrong way...

A good start would be 40-50 prefolds and 5 wraps. At our local cloth diapering store, it'd be a total of about $150 investment. You'll definitely add to your stock as baby grows. When they start having poo blowouts, it may be time to go up in size. I used a "Snappi" for awhile, but they do have to be replaced. They're great for holding on the prefold...or if you just want to use a prefold with out a wrap. Definitley cheap!!! I don't prefer to feel baby pee.

As for cleaning, I have a pretty basic thought process -- it's baby pee & poo. Seriously, it's digested breast milk. It doesn't even stink until they start eating solids. Get a hamper. That's it. You don't need a pail. And you do laundry every other day or so, depending on your schedule and supply. Some people use a liner, a cloth laundry sack, in the hamper. I don't use one anymore because it got annoying. Condensation gathers at the bottom of the hamper whether you use the liner or not. This "condensation" is pee, so I just rinse the hamper like once a week. If a little poo gets on the inside of the hamper I just spray some bathroom cleaner and scrub it a little. Simple.

**HAHA! We went back to using the liner when Abe starting eating solids regularly. His pee and poo has started to look and smell more like adult pee and poo. The cloth liner will absorb some of the wet and therefore some of the smell.

Abe just started eating solids, so I've changed up how I deal with it. His poo is real sticky now, so instead of tossing it in the hamper right away, I toss it in the toilet. I have a pair of rubber gloves that I put on and I use the toilet water to get the poo off the prefold. Then I wring the prefold, flush the poo, rinse my gloves, get a clorox (or green works) wipe, wipe the toilet & sink out and toss the wipe in the toilet. It keeps the bathroom as disinfected as before... There are sprayers you can buy that hook up to the toilet basin, so you dont' have to touch poo with your hands. But you'd still want to use gloves and wipes. Again, my thought is that it's just baby poo.

Think of it this way: your baby's diapers start to fit him/her like your favorite jeans fit you. Diposibles are more like wearing a paper sack. It makes sense that the disposibles are more of a hassle. Also, what have mothers been doing for centuries? Throwing aaway their baby diapers. Oh no...they've been cloth diapering. The cool thing is that we have the ability to use reusable plastics that keep us a wee bit cleaner.

When you do your laundry, you just do a rinse cycle before the regular wash. Then do a hot wash with 1/2 the amount of detergent. I've heard that you're supposed to use a natural, "green" detergent. Again, we're poor, so I use a powder Arm & Hammer. Abe's never had any rashes or anything, so we're good. If they do get a rash, you just run a couple hot washes to get the detergent residue off the fibers of the prefold. AND experiment with various detergents. The gentler the better. Contrary to popular belief, Dreft has all the same harsh chemicals as Tide. :/

**Charlies soap is supposed to be MAGNIFICENT. It seems expensive, but you only use a tablespoon per load. It's "green"! You can usually refill the bag wherever it's sold locally. Perhaps Whole Foods, if you have one. Or your local co-op. And certainly if you have a cloth diapering store... http://www.charliesoap.com/

Wash the wraps with the prefolds. Try to line dry. The sun is a natural disinfectant and bleach. Some poo will stain, but the sun will bleach it out.

**I've recently learned two other ways to "bleach": peroxide is totally harmless, as it turns straight to pure water when it oxidizes. And the process of oxidization turns things white (same concept as OxyClean). Another is drying them on bushes. A plant's job is to turn carbon dioxide into oxygen, and they do this with the help of the sun. So in the middle of a sunny day, bushes are releasing oxygen back into the atmosphere and turning. If you lay the diapers on the bush to catch some of that oxygen, it will do essentially the same thing as the peroxide; "oxygenation bleaches."

Night diapering: I just use 2 prefolds. Because nighttime sleep is so groggy and you just want to nurse and fall back asleep, I don't change his diaper unless he pooped. He pooped at just about every feeding until he was about 2 months... But then he started sleeping through the night. We use a Motherease wrap (because they're so big) and 2 prefolds and he rarely, if ever, wicks or leaks. There are wool wraps that are supposed to be great for nighttime. But, again, I am cheap and have never invested in one.

That's about all I've got. :)

Obviously, I breastfeed, so if you're planning on formula, I can't swear it won't stink. :) A great resource is La Leche League. Yes, they're all about breastfeeding, but I am going to venture a guess that they'll have TONS of information about cloth diapering and where to go to get the best service in your area. I don't agree with some of their advice on certain topics, but they know their stuff about breastfeeding and cloth diapering to say the least. :)

**http://www.llli.org/ to find a local LLL leader!

Hope this helps!

From another email: First of all: if you have a chance to find and visit a cloth diapering store, you are going to find SO much more there than you will online.

**an addendum to this: Mothering magazine has a bunch of ads of fabulous brands. What you Google and "find" online doesn't give as much variety as you can find perusing mags, like Mothering. Some examples of amazing brands are: Mother Ease, Blueberry, Swaddlebees.

All-in-ones are amazing for big babies. If your newborn is smaller than 10 lbs, you will have a hard time keeping them from leaking.

**I don't do all-in-ones, so this is just heresay. If there are any mommies who do, please add your two cents!

There is a one-size wrap and I use them and LOVE them; they are called Blueberries. It is the same company that makes Swaddlebee's. Swaddlebee's wick a lot (pee pee soaks through the wrap if you don't change the prefold after every pee or two), so they are not my favorite. But the Blueberries have a waterproof (kind of) layer on the inside, so they work really well.

Here's another thought: Abe is STILL in a small. Granted, he was 9.7 at birth, but his skinny butt still doesn't fit into medium wraps. So, while, the all-in-ones seem logical, they may not be as simple as they seem.

Really, it's all about personal choice. Whatever works for you. We chose wraps and prefolds for a couple reasons: less laundry, less expensive, longer life. I wish I could send you some of mine, just so you could try them out.

The main reason I didn't go with all-in-ones was price and the amount of laundry. Also, you can reuse the wrap over and over until it's soiled or stinky. Do you have your daycare picked out? Ask them if they have a preference. As long as they're using gloves when they change diapies, there's really no difference with popping a prefold into a grocery sack and tossing a soiled disposible.

Target sells some all-in-ones. WalMart sells prefolds and plastic undies. ...I use neither...

**I find that store bought things are just cheap. Again, you have to get a little creative; it's very worthwhile to visit a cloth diapering store and develop a relationship (like all things new-to-mommies, this can be VERY maddening when it's not going well or they're changing...). Visit a store *even if you have to drive a couple hours on the weekend.* If you're in NC, I am pretty sure there are good stores in Raleigh and possibly in Asheville. Charlotte has GOT to have something, lol.

There are different levels of absorbency depending on what material you use. A lot of the all-in-ones are fleece, which is really absorbent. Hemp is more absorbent than unbleached cotton is more absorbent than bleached cotton.

Maybe you can do all-in-ones during the week and prefolds and wraps at night and on weekends??

You can always order through our clothe diapering store if you can't find a decent one. Bernice is AWESOME! terra-tots.com

**punkinbutt.com is a great resource, too.

10/30 -- Fun Friday

Today Mark has got a non-stop day at school. Drills, school-wide testing, Clubs, and a Reward Dance. Woo. Go honey!

For me, today has been a day of inspiration. I have been trying to develop my passion for paper, using my soon-to-be-wed friends as the guinea pigs. (By the way, can we talk about the ridiculous number of weddings and BABIES!?) I found some fuel today: Sincerely Yours Paper. Hopefully, as the weddings keep rolling along, I'll grow my passion. It's intimidating to know there is someone who is already doing what I want to do in my area. But to serve the lovely brides who live hither and yon is really the audience I want to cater to.

I've decided not to be intimidated, rather to glean what I can from others' talents. When I took 2D to fulfill a Comm. requirement in undergrad, I learned from my professor and classmates -- all proclaimed *artisits.* I wasn't intimidated because it was, afterall, just the fulfillment of a requirement. What I didn't know going into the class was that I would learn so much. And I walked away wondering my I didn't persue Art as a minor. It is truly exhilirating to know I can persue and learn from true professionals.

As little man demands my attention, today I will meditate on what in the world Cherie's vision is and try to accomodate! ...Fun Friday it truly is!

Well, it's been awhile since my last post, huh?

The vermicomposting was a FAIL. I simply did not have enough worms. I will try it again, but we needed something terribly economical, so we just started a compost heap. The end result is healthy, organic fertilizer and that is the goal. I am not planning a Fall garden, but I do truly hope to start something in the Spring. We shall see. Meanwhile, I am going to pot a few mums and see how black my thumb is. :)

Among other home improvement projects are the blinds. The previous owner of our abode had all the windows covered with mini blinds, instead of having the blind inlaid in the window panes. So, we switched all of them out this week. Hubby started by showing me how to use a drill. I was really afraid he was going to have to do them all. Abe was a champ this Thursday all day (though his naps have been extremely sporadic), so the biggest chunk is done.

A continuation of that project, and therefore my next big project will be the front room's windows. They are beasts. 64 inches tall. 2 flanks that are 27 inches wide and the two picture windows that are 48 inches wide. Currently, they are covered with a cornice and vertical blinds. I really want to bring out the architectural detail of the windows; their style is a theme in the house. And I am all about theme. :) I really want to hang curtains (found some I love, and, yes, they are turquoise, at Lowe's. But it'd be at least $120...not sure I'm up for that kind of a chunk) in the big guys and mini blinds on the flanks. I know that mini blinds are not the most posh in style, but they are so functional. For example, if we want, in the winter, if our heating bills get to be massive (as I hear homes our age can truly jack up the gas bill), we can still have the light filtering blinds and put up plastic to help save some heat from escaping.

In other news: Abe is cutting teeth. Still. It's been 2 months of unpredictable moods. I wish it were easier, as so many moms say it is. His bottom 2 both came up, but one receded again. I am pretty sure his top 4 will come through soon. By soon, I do mean in the next 6 months. Ha.

I have a friend who is very excited about tapping a currently untapped need in our community: cloth diapering. She wants to start a service. While many moms will admit that they'd rather cloth diaper, many don't because they are working professionals and don't have the time to do it and do it well. (Who can blame them? Poopy stinks!) So Jai and I are hoping to put our heads together and get a cloth diapering service started. We'd like to have other local businesses, i.e. Terra Tots, the local natural parenting store, work in cahoots with us so families can get the best of the best in quality. I think we are going to be OVERWHELMED with the response. So many people want to be green conscious, but have no guidance or don't know where to begin. Hopefully, we can be a bit of a beacon. We'll see how it goes.

This Sabbath kicks off the Fall Holy Day season, Leviticus 23. Tonight is the Feast of Trumpets. Mark and I realized (again) that we have one more "normal" week. Then next Friday is another Sabbath, then we have Sunday day free (really for more prep, especially since Sundays are one of our busiest days -- cleaning, groceries, big tasks, i.e. recycling, etc.), Sunday night is the start of Atonement, Atonement services Monday. Tuesday Mark has Parent-Teacher conferences, so he'll be gone Tuesday until 7:30 and then we leave for Texas and the Feast of Tabernacles on Wednesday morning. So deep breaths.

Tonight and tomorrow are super special because it pictures Jesus Christ's return and the beginning of the end of human suffering, our final conversion to spirit bodies, and the establishment of proper government. That's a lot to swallow, chew with caution.

So to all, cheers to a joyous and meaningful Fall Holy Day season, happy Sabbath, and good night!

it is done

I just put the worms in their new home and put their new home in the garage. Vermicomposting, thank you Annette Triplett for introducing me to it. Thanks to incredible amounts of information online, it was just about the easiest, proactive, sustainable project I've taken on. Even recycling is more complicated than vermicomposting.

Let's just talk sustainability again! The more I *think* through where my waste is going -- trash, used (grey) water, leftovers, etc., the more obligated I feel to take care of it. Our society, and the US in particular, has a "throw away" mentality. There is absolutely no reason I should not compost. Landfills are half biodegradable, if not more. But if all that biodegradable, good trash is in a landfill, it's not doing any good. However, if it's in my garage becoming compost, it will do good for my future garden. I don't have a garden and I don't even know when I'll have a the garden I dream of. I can have healthy soil though. Or my neighbors can. The thought to sell my vermicompost has even crossed my mind. If all the wormies do is eat, poop and procreate, I could quite possibly have a little worm farm. Who wouldn't prefer organic fertilizer? Oh the possibilities!

There are million great things about composting, but the reason I decided to try the vermicomposting is because I can literally do it in my garage. There is little to no work involved. All I do is collect all the veggies, fruit and wood fiber and feed it to my worms. And they make fertilizer. Awesome.

I do have a couple concerns, so we'll have to see how the next few months go. The most obvious is the smell. If the worms don't eat it quick enough, the rotting ex-food will start to stink. While the concept of keeping it close to the door is brilliant, the possible smell is not so brilliant. I want to see just how little work I have to do, so we may have to deal with the stink until the balance between exertion and little to no stink is found. The solution for the stink is simple: help the worms break down the compost -- tear your wood fiber up more or shred it in a shredder, puree the ex-food, etc.

Another really cool thing about composting is that I don't necessarily have to use trash bags any more. If I am not putting wet into the trash, there's no reason to use a liner. When, however, I do need to toss the chicken guts and bones, where do they go? In a grocery bag and then out to the big trash can. I have often thought of putting those scraps out for the neighborhood cats. Mark doesn't think that's wise.

So we are recycling and composting. Our next big project will be either fixing the screens in the sun room or rain barrels. The rain barrels are a HUGE project, way bigger than creating my worms' home. After that, raised square foot gardens in the sunroom.

worms

We are making our bin tonight!!! :) http://www.howtohomestead.org/?page_id=182

Thanks to the hubby for helping me take care of the babe and supporting this INSANITY! Woo.

harmony

Harmo-nah. Harmony. Harmo-na-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Haaaaaapy Birthday, big sis. You are the most amazing big sister any little sister could ever ask for!

work

Things have been quite exciting around the Sandor house. First of all, Abe is sleeping through the night again. I thought I was going to self-destruct. He was waking up every 2.5 hours between 10:00 and 6. A couple nights ago, I gave him rice when we had dinner and viola!, he didn't wake the following morning until 5:50. Nice.

I have been working on some wedding invitations for a couple ladies. I don't actually know them; we've never met. But church family is church family. All "my girls" (ladies that were high school staff at LYC in 2006 & 2007) know these two girls quite well. And they're not bridezillas. What a blessing! The coolest part of doing invitations is that I have a vision, ideas for what I want, but trying to put thought to paper is generally not so simple. This week I worked on finding a reliable printer who is willing to help me learn and be very patient. I learned the difference between RGB colors and Pantone colors. IN-credible. I *think* I am going to go with Just-Us printers in Springdale. YES! Brett Justus is client of Andrea's, the loan officer whose portfolio I was responsible for. Good times.

I got a call from Mark Martinez tonight. He used to be the man we worked for at Outback. What a terror. There were definitely moments, hours, days when he made us hate our jobs, sometimes ourselves. But for some reason he has this undying loyalty to his employees (well, those he likes). If you are so lucky to win his favor, you love him reciprocally. Dysfunctional? Yes. But, hey, it's times like these crazy relationships like ours come in handy. He needs someone to do "admin" for the restaurant he recently opened called Louie's. Admin = figuring out tipshares, payroll, scheduling (possibly). It just-so happens that finance is one of those things I am good at. This will give me expertise in the realm of payroll I've never had. It's part-time, and right now is a great time to get started. Mark is on summer break, so he'll watch Abe for the time being. We'll see if it's going to be a blessing or too much of a hassle.

Here's to full nights of sleep, fun projects and possibly a little cash money!

cámara

Thanks to Great Grandma Stamerjohn (Abe's paternally maternal great grandmother), we have a new camera! And it got the thumbs up from Randy. Sweet. Canon Powershot! Peace.

list

About a year and a half ago I bought a little notepad for the sole purpose of keeping a list of things I wanted to pray about. Sometimes, I get on my knees and I could talk and talk and talk for an hour. Most times, however, I get on my knees and I get lost. So the list is really great for remembering to pray for things, meanwhile helping to keep me focussed.

There are a few things I have checked off the list because they are no longer relevant. "Irrelevant prayers?" Yes! They've been answered. I am not sure that if it's more inspiring to have a list or to have things scratched off... Here are a few of the things that have been checked off:

• [One of my best friends who will remain unnamed]'s family being replaced (she chose Living over her family's choice to leave Living). (She is now on the verge of engagement. And she might wring my neck if she knew I was blogging about her... :)
• Lana Moluf
• Getting pregnant (HA!), finding a doctor, er midwife (not sure I actually WROTE and prayed consistently about my 'planned' birth experience...)
• [Another girlfriend]'s heart being healed, and joy replaced. (She had a really terrible breakup, and was having a really hard time recovering. She is now planning the day she will wed the man she calls her soul mate.)
• [Another friend to remain unnamed who had]'s postartum depression, bonding with her beautiful baby girl.

These may seem obscure to you, but they were my prayers. And they were answered. God is good.

green er er er

Thinking about composting. Not that I have a pile at the apt. But Jaime & Jason have one.

I wish I had a line to dry my laundry on. Again, not at the apt. What a fun and efficient way to cut expenses no? And bleach diapers. :)

Should we buy a house?

it's how we roll

So about those 2 hour naps. haha. Lasted that day and that day only. The next day Abe took one 1.5 hour nap, one 1 hour nap and one 30 minute nap. [30 minute naps are not long enough to give anyone "restorative" sleep. They are the proverbial "power nap." Restorative sleep -- 45 minutes, plus -- is really best.] The next day it was something like 1 hr., 45 minutes, 30 minutes, needed another, but refused, so I put him in his swing for a half hour. The next day was worse and the next worse, etc. In that time he ROLLED OVER. Yay, Abraham! Rolling over means breaking of the swaddle cold turkey. Tying his arms close to him for each nap (he didn't need it at nighttime, except when we were travelling) really calmed him, so we did it...until now. So much changing for the little guy.

We changed his bedtime. I thought putting him down at 6 was easier since he is so fussy later in the day. No no. I was getting up at least twice a night. If I put him down at 7, he gets up anywhere between 9 and 11, then is back down til anywhere between 6 & 6:30. Nighttime sleep is gooood for Mommy! :) And Daddy. And Baby...

This is the conclusion I keep coming back to: if I roll with it, he'll be fine and so will I. The guidance that seems to be the most accurate, though not necessarily so directive is: "If he's pooping & peeing, he's fine." Ha. Well, I can promise you he's doing that!

sleep

I cannot believe I have a little bit of time to actually blog. Prayers: check, bread made: check, shower: check, blown-dry hair: check. Abe's is down for his second nap of the day. It's taken us until he is 5 months to figure out daytime sleep. I started to feel like I was going crazy when he was 4 weeks old. I gave it some more time (because letting him 'cry it out' was horrendous), then felt crazy again by 8 weeks. He slept through the night from 8 weeks (and, yes, I let him cry it out. It took swaddling him to let him fall asleep on his own. We still swaddle, and for us, it equates sanity.) t0 18 weeks. But he was only taking 1/2 hour - hour long naps during the day. I hesitate to call Abraham cranky, but he didn't seem to be rested. So at 18 weeks I decided we needed to try something else. (To this point we had been doing BabyWise, with much guidance of a good friend to whom I will be forever indebted!) I am no longer a fan of dogmatic suppositions of any kind. Thank you, motherhood. If I say, "We're doing 'Healthy Sleep Habits,'" I'd be dogmatic. If I said, "Yeah, we did BabyWise, and it sucked," I'd also be dogmatic. Babywise did a couple of amazing things -- Abe can fall asleep if I wake him while putting him in his crib and he can fall back asleep on his own during the night. He naps. Oh, he naps. Thank you, BabyWise for teaching me that babies DO nap! There are others that are not at the top of my brain right now, I am sure.

Healthy Sleep Habits teaches the importance of napping, too, but it is much more flexible. One rule: never wake a sleeping baby. This is a rule of thumb. It speaks specifically to the first few months of life. Baby brains need to develop and mommies have to be patient and wait for their development to occur. It teaches that eventually kids' sleep habits will organize themselves, especially with a little guidance from Mom. When they get to be Abe's age -- 5 months, plus, it's okay to let them fuss a little. We just got back from trip to NC. All normal sleep patterns are essentially tossed until we get home. The second night we were home, I let him fuss through his first waking (I don't think he was really awake, because when Abe's really awake and needs something, he has always been very vocal. This "fussing" was "eh, eeeeh, eeeeeh. eh...") and it took him 15 minutes, but then he was back asleep.

Another thing I've changed is that I do comfort him to sleep. Many, many baby sleep books and theorists say to let them fall asleep on their own -- hugs and kiss, set them in the crib and walk away. While I see the benefit in that, it didn't work with Abe. He cried for 2 days before I swaddled him. Then he started just lying there making baby noise until he fell asleep 40 minutes later, only to wake 30 minutes after that. Maddening. So I went back to rocking him. (Until he was 8 weeks I was in the rocker 8 hours a day...again, maddening.) It takes less than 10 minutes (if I respond to his tired cues in good time) of rocking, then I wrap him up, he either stays or falls back to sleep for at least an hour (today it's been 2 hours) at a time.

So I've given up 8 hours of solid sleep for daytime sleep. Abe now regularly sleeps for 1.5 to 2 hours 2 or 3 times a day. It's amazing. He has a bedtime routine that begins at 6:30 -- shower, lotion, PJs, storytime with Daddy, rock to sleep. He usually gets up once, usually about 9 (before we go to bed), and then again at some point in the evening. But then he's back down until 6. Hopefully by the time his 6 months he will drop those 2 wakings and will be sleeping through the night from 6 to 6. That's what Healthy Sleep Habits *says* he'll do. Again, we'll see; don't want to be dogmatic. They do say that once they're 6 months, it's okay to start them on a routine -- morning nap at such and such a time, afternoon nap, evening nap (if they'll take one...). We may start that once I see if this 2 hour nap thing is for real :)

When I first had him, I didn't want to hear, "You just have to figure out your baby." And, "Don't you wish they came with an instruction manual." But it is SO true. Abe is an amazing individual. With time, I have found what is best for him. And I can honestly say that I think I am doing the very best for our baby.