support

I don't have to reitterate the insanity of the first days of Abe's air-breathing life. We ended up with an unplanned cesarean delivery and a wretched BFing experience. However, it has all been worth it. Our planned homebirth brought us so much peace -- my midwife was so incredible. When there were things that came up that could have led to an early C-section, she found a way to wait for my body's interpretation of the right time for labor. There was a lot of processing I had to do; I felt totally defeated after fighting for nine months to avoid the threat of a cesarean. (Society's pressure to have a hospital birth is so strong. Society doesn't tell you that the national average for surgery during labor is extremely dangerous, but birth isn't "extremely" dangerous at all. If anything, it's beautiful and empowering!)

So this time around, we have chosen to have a hospital delivery. Licensed midwives in the state of Arkansas cannot deliver VBAC (though they can in most states where homebirth midwifery is legal). I could go with an unlicensed midwife, but I have anxiety there. So we're going to have a monitrice -- a midwife who doesn't do prenatals, but is your birth coach and is there for as much of the labor as you want and need her there. The joy is that she is apprenticing with my midwife from Abe's birth. They have very similar philosophies and approaches to birth. She is excited to labor with us at home until I am ready for the hospital. This means that I get to build momentum where I am most comfortable, then go to the hospital (with a team I am really happy to work with, may I mention!) when I am far along enough to make it. If my labor is so fast that I don't make it to the hospital, I have this amazing woman there to guarantee safety! What more could I ask for?

While I really had to work through the disappointment of a cesarean delivery with Abe, I get to celebrate Baby Two's entry into this world with a wonderful team of people, including my supportive husband, monitrice and a doctor who cherishes healthy, mother and family friendly birth. Three hurrahs!!!