spring HDs

So I am on a total roll. I definitely have strides where blogging is good for the soul. It's good for this soul of late it seems.

Well, the Spring Holy Days are fast-approaching. Five weeks before Passover. I can't believe it's almost here already. Every year, we are supposed to examine ourselves -- 2Cor 13:5 reads, "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you--unless, of course, you fail the test?" And 1Cor 11:28 says, "A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup." And there are tons of ways you can do it, many have been talked about in recent sermons from HQ and our local leaders' speeches. Among them: read through 1Corinthians and identify Spring Holy Day references. (I have never counted how many times Paul says, "leaven," but it is many!) Analyze the Sermon on the Mount and the Beattitudes and the armor of God in Ephesians 6.

I've decided to read through 4 chapters of 1Corinthians a day, take notes (like I am actually studying it...), and look for those Spring HD references. One I came upon yesterday is in chapter 3:14-15 -- If anyone's work which he has built on it endures, he will receive a reward. If anyone's work is burned, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire.

Paul is talking to Christians, and the reference seems to be making it to the Kingdom. What's scary is that, despite one's declaration of being a Christian, his work, the elbow grease he puts into his life will determine the shape he's in when he gets there. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be dealing with 3rd & 4th degree burns when Jesus Christ returns. I'd much rather be ready to hit the ground running. I mean, really, let's get to work, people!

But if I honestly take a look at the quality of my spiritual life, how well I communicate with God and He does so with me through study, my material is probably not gold, silver and precious stone. It's more like wood or hay or straw, though I'd like to think it's more like earthen clay...somewhere in the middle. I say I am in the middle, riding the fence perhaps? Oh, that's even worse! Am I truly admitting that I am Laodecian? Ay.

I don't have the composure to divulge further. I can, however, be truly ready and willing to continue to find time to dig deep and take a good look in the mirror. The promise really is perfection, and that only when Jesus Christ takes His stand upon His return. I say, bring it.

support

I don't have to reitterate the insanity of the first days of Abe's air-breathing life. We ended up with an unplanned cesarean delivery and a wretched BFing experience. However, it has all been worth it. Our planned homebirth brought us so much peace -- my midwife was so incredible. When there were things that came up that could have led to an early C-section, she found a way to wait for my body's interpretation of the right time for labor. There was a lot of processing I had to do; I felt totally defeated after fighting for nine months to avoid the threat of a cesarean. (Society's pressure to have a hospital birth is so strong. Society doesn't tell you that the national average for surgery during labor is extremely dangerous, but birth isn't "extremely" dangerous at all. If anything, it's beautiful and empowering!)

So this time around, we have chosen to have a hospital delivery. Licensed midwives in the state of Arkansas cannot deliver VBAC (though they can in most states where homebirth midwifery is legal). I could go with an unlicensed midwife, but I have anxiety there. So we're going to have a monitrice -- a midwife who doesn't do prenatals, but is your birth coach and is there for as much of the labor as you want and need her there. The joy is that she is apprenticing with my midwife from Abe's birth. They have very similar philosophies and approaches to birth. She is excited to labor with us at home until I am ready for the hospital. This means that I get to build momentum where I am most comfortable, then go to the hospital (with a team I am really happy to work with, may I mention!) when I am far along enough to make it. If my labor is so fast that I don't make it to the hospital, I have this amazing woman there to guarantee safety! What more could I ask for?

While I really had to work through the disappointment of a cesarean delivery with Abe, I get to celebrate Baby Two's entry into this world with a wonderful team of people, including my supportive husband, monitrice and a doctor who cherishes healthy, mother and family friendly birth. Three hurrahs!!!

diaper rash

For 15, almost 16, months Abraham has had ABSOLUTELY no diaper rash. I commend the cotton for it; cloth diapers really are amazing, especially at helping moms prevent painful diaper rash. Well, those bragging rights are over for us. This weekend, we took a trip to Fort Smith. Abe's bedtime is 7, and we left about 5:30, so we figured he'd be out in the car and then go straight to bed. We were right about the first half. In anticipation, I doubled his prefold (which is what I do every night...). Apparently, he pooed at sometime in the night, probably right when we left Fort Smith and before he fell asleep. So we get home, he wakes up when the garage door light comes on, totally awake and aware. So we completely avoid the night time routine and just put his PJs on. Mark reads to him and he falls asleep within about 20 minutes, longer than normal, but that's to be expected with his hour long nap on the ride home. In the AM, poor guy is ANGRY. I figured it was teeth. Afterall, he is cutting 6 at present. After about a 1/2 hour of whining, I decide to change his diaper (the normal fiasco ensues). But when we're all done, he is our happy baby. Unfortunately, the discovery of the 13 hour old poo is made in the meantime. With the poo is the rash. And it's bad. His skin is chaffed and raw. I googled, "natural remedies diaper rash." First suggestion: Bag Balm. SWEET action. I have a whole container stowed from when I first started BFing. So between Bag Balm and airy cotton, I hope my boy heals soon. It is absolutely heart-breaking to see his hiney in what has to be so much pain.

So suggestion to moms -- invest in some prefolds (for times like these, what they have at Walmart will do), a Snappy, and some Bag Balm. Let that rash air out. I still haven't found the gumption to let him run around naked. Maybe I will later today!

homemade dishwasher detergent

We spend about $10/month on dishwasher detergent. Two thoughts: I don't have to use the dishwasher everyday and homemade dishwasher detergent is SO much cheaper. Here's the recipe:

two cups washing soda
two cups borax
one tablespoon of citric acid (or lemon juice powder)

VIOLA! The beauty: that recipe will last you a month, easy and it costs about $2. The best part of being home with my little man is that I get to enjoy his sweet life, yes. Second best is these fun discoveries. It's green, it's easy and it's so much cheaper than conventional detergent!

white vinegar

I am not sure I have yet expressed the utter joy it gives me to use white vinegar. It's strong, but boys and girls, it cleans. I am using up the last of all my conventional bathroom cleaners, kitchen cleaners, bleach and whatnot, to be replaced with the one, the only WHITE VINEGAR. This stuff is amazing. Between it and washing soda, my domestic life has taken a turn for the better!

simplifying

Life has been challenging me to find balance. Is that not always the challenge? Perhaps for those who are not so insane, your balance just comes to you. That is not so with me. I have to work hard to find it, and then when I do find it, I have to check and recheck that I have indeed found it.

Since we're pregnant again, my diet has become the thing nagging at the back of my mind. When we met with our midwives frequently, they were sure to enquire about our eating habits. Since we aren't using a midwife this time (not by choice, but because we are attempting a VBAC and don't want to use an unlicensed midwife. (State regulations and rules about midwifery might be a viable option for a later post.)), I haven't been as diligent about making wise food choices. I say we don't have a midwife, but we do have the "spirit" of one. We are going to use a sweet friend named Mariah White to act as our monitrice/birthcoach/doula. She is currently apprenticing with the midwife from Abe's birth, Jennifer Creel, and will be a full-on licensed midwife in about 6 months (I think). While I find it hard to hold myself accountable (lame, I know, but I love a cherry vanilla coke from Sonic, McDonalds french fries and various other forms of junk), Mariah asks about my eating habits.

She joined me for my prenatal (19 weeks) last week and gave me a few great suggestions. The simplest was to buy a bag of frozen fruit...make it fun. Sam's has massive bags, as does WalMart, of strawberries, peaches, pineapple and mango. She also suggested, making and eating my own granola. After Abe was born, I LOVED making my own granola. But have since gotten lazy. It tastes so much better than anything store bought, and I can put blackstrap molasses in it to help boost my iron. This week we are implementing those two things. Once things become habits, I find it so much easier to be the person I intend to be, to find that ever-sought-after balance I need.